02 Nov Why We Don’t Feel We Can Achieve Big Goals, and What the Real Barrier Is
Why we don’t feel we can achieve big goals
Can you talk around big goal setting and money please? I feel like there’s a big hustle culture these days and large goals which feel unobtainable. I get the law of attraction and it’s good to aim high, but it can also keep you stuck.
- Why we don’t feel we can achieve big goals
- What is the real barrier here?
- How incremental goals build your self belief
- Linking into that, how structure brings about the steps towards the bigger goal.
They also offered a story:
A bit of context, about 15 years ago I got inspired by this “regular guy”…who became a millionaire in a year using the law of attraction….I set the same goal, but I was sick with fear most of the time, had no plan then didn’t reach my goal. I had a lot of shame and self-hatred after that.
So, why don’t we feel we can achieve big goals?
How incremental goals build your self-belief
The path is incremental.
For example, I asked this soul-colleague (who is coaching with me 1:1) to chunk up their long-term income goal from the making and the promotion of their art into a near-term income goal. And I specifically gave them the homework of doing this homework three times:
I propose you do this in three stages:
- Allow whatever answers come up immediately in the first stage.
- Meditate and then reflect on the questions in the second stage, possibly coming up with a second answer to each.
- Meditate and then allow yourself to integrate and come up with a final-for-now answer to each question in order to ground your answers a bit more but still have time to send them to me 24 hours in advance of our [first coaching] session.
Once you see yourself achieving something important, you can keep right on doing it.
You may still feel queasy at times.
Structure brings about the steps towards the bigger goal
So the final point is that you can structure your success. You can structure your achievement of the bigger goal. You just make it up! That’s how I do it. I invent a schedule of times, at particular days of the week, like a course I am creating for myself. (Which is what it is.)
And then I follow that course.
I do this because it makes me feel less queasy and sick. It reassures the parts of me who are hesitant that I know what I’m doing, I’m taking it slow, and I’m not just talking a good game about incremental–I’m acting on it.
Here are some resources for “chunking up” and structuring your progress toward the bigger goal you’ve set. Feel free to experiment, modify, and make it your own. Of course, keep progressing toward your bigger goal, and altering the course you’ve set yourself to reflect that. You’ve got this. If you’ve ever studied anything, you understand how to do this. (If you have questions, ask me! I love questions. They’re what inspired this blog post).