Three Clues I Shouldn’t Do It “Even If You Paid Me”

Three Clues I Shouldn’t Do It “Even If You Paid Me”

a brown owl with piercing golden eyes

Wisdom is knowing I shouldn’t do it “even if you paid me.” This wise owl with the piercing golden eyes is by James Lee on Unsplash.

I Shouldn’t Do It–Even if You Paid Me

True Story

Once upon a time, a  potential client asked us to work with them. Their project description was beyond complete, with several very impressive attachments.  The project? I got a massive headache.

First Clue: Body Talking

I never get headaches.  Headaches are therefore–for me–good information.  If your left foot never itches and you can’t stop scratching it, we’d say, “pay attention.”   If we don’t listen when our bodies speak politely, they seem to get louder and louder, and that can just be totally unwelcome.  So we’ve learned to welcome the body talking.

I took some Perelandra’s ETS+ for Humans, a subtle remedy for all kinds of trauma to the human system which comes in vinegar as well as brandy.  And the headache went away, so I could focus on the potential client’s Application.

Second Clue : Projects Needs a Complete Overhaul

Immediately, the desire not to work on the project (without an overhaul) came back.

We’ve stopped asking for overhauls.  What our perceived need for an overhaul usually means is that we’re not the right partner for the work.  (Exception: a client asks us to partner with them on an overhaul, which is great.)

Here’s what I knew: 1. We might want to work with this person.  2. We didn’t want to work on this project as designed.  3. Our request for an overhaul would be unwelcome.

I trust what I feel.  I just don’t always trust others’ hearing what I feel.  I got scared. I asked for more information.

Third Clue: Would I Do It for the Squirrels?

“More information”–what a dodge! Old me cracks me up sometimes.

But stalling for time brought me new appreciation for my potential client, helped me clarify myself to myself, and most importantly, allowed time’s soothing waters to flow into the too-tight space between us and our potential client.

If I don’t feel it would be something I would do in the spirit of Saint Francis who said he would preach to the squirrels,  it’s not right for me.  The peaceful, ethical way I design projects allows a natural inflow of support into a structure prepared to receive it.  It makes raising money easy.  But if I take work that feels hard, and is going to be a struggle, I work against my own principles and my own energy and I make the project hard, to boot! Honestly, when we say “I wouldn’t do it even if you paid me,” it means “I shouldn’t do it even if you paid me,” and it means I shouldn’t do it at all. Bottom-line.

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  • beth crittenden
    Posted at 01:26h, 05 October Reply

    I love those body signals, like headaches, that tell me the best clues. Those signals can be life-saving when I have dipped back in to codependent denying silence and haven’t realized it. I live in gratitude now for what I used to get angry about or try to cover up. That’s humbling.

    Also I’m appreciating that there was a time where I NEVER dreamed I could be self-employed and tolerate the uncertainty. After I became self-employed, I NEVER dreamed I’d be able to turn away anyone who wanted to pay me to do work. It feels like nice growth to read this now, knowing that Spirit has led me to a wonderful balance, where my money eggs are not all in 1 basket. What a blessing to have true choice.

    • Beth
      Posted at 08:52h, 05 October Reply

      And what a blessing it is to work with you, Beth, becoming financially organized! I so heartfully recommend it.

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